Interview

We Can Make You Have Children – Dr. Abayomi Ajayi

Dr Abayomi AjayiDr. Abayomi Ajayi is a consultant Obsterician and Gynaecologist and the Managing Director, Nordica Fertility Centre, Lagos, a clinic that specialises in In-Vitro Fertilisation (IVF) and treatment of infertility for the couples facing fertility problem in marriages. In this interview with selected journalists in his office, he said as long as there is a drop of sperm in a man’s testicles, he will make him have children. ORUKPE NELSON was there.

When fertility medicine is being mentioned in Nigeria, NORDICA Fertility Centre comes to mind, how did you get to where you are today, despite the challenges?

Well, I don’t know which position I’m now but everything is God’s favour. God favoured us for the fact that we were willing to launch into an unknown territory.

About 11 years ago, when we moved into fertility treatment in Nigeria, it was still an unknown terrain that the people were saying it would not work due to poor infrastructure.

In fact, fertility treatment requires a lot of infrastructure and basically, I would say that the problem anybody who wants to go into this sector will face is that of infrastructures, light and others. Also, there is no support from the government and its parastatals.

When we started, the government parastatals did not take into cognisance, the difference between imported household furniture and laboratory equipment for treatment. The first time I brought in my equipment, they categorised it as metallic furniture. Yet those were my incubators.

These were some of the things we went through initially but I think it’s getting better now. But they still find it difficult categorising these equipment for fertility treatment as medicals.

How small did you start Nordica, in one room or in a cubicle?

Nupe! Nupe!! I started big from day one because I worked in another hospital, which made me to understand that you probably can’t start a good thing alone, rather you needed to partner others to raise the funds. So, I didn’t start from one room or managing candle or something else.

From day one, I started with everything that is required for good practice. But before then, we needed to look at the gap in Nigerian health sector to see those things that people said were impossible so as to find solution around them.

That was the mindset I have to give these people the kind of service that they can get in any other place in the world. There was no any form of management right from day one.

What really spurred you into fertility medicine?

Necessity, they said is the mother of invention. Since when I was being trained as a doctor, I always wanted to go into gynecology. So, when I finished, the only thing that appealed to me was fertility medicine.

Why? It was one part of gynecology that we don’t get good result from. If you look round, you would discover that a lot of people, who are accomplished in life don’t have children and medical sciences in Nigeria could not attend to their needs.

Then, one of the things that were in my mind was, how I’m going to solve these needs? In some part of the world, IVF is a solution and people were discouraging me that it wasn’t going to happen in Nigeria.

Then, while they were saying all these, somebody came in from the UK to start his IVF clinic in Nigeria. And that was the impetus I needed. I said, if this person can do it, I can also do it. That was how we started Nordica.

Recently, cases of male and female infertility are on the rise in Nigeria, what are the causes of this condition?

I don’t know but all over the world, it’s happening. It’s not Nigeria thing. Many people are debating whether the things that cause infertility are what happened when we were born or when we were still in the womb, or inherited or from external environment. What we have seen is that there are many factors responsible for it.

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So, it wasn’t as if there is something we are doing wrongly?

No, it’s a worldwide thing. There are many factors responsible, including environment, lifestyles but there is no singular factor one can say causes it.

If there is, it would have been easy to prevent it. It’s multi-factorial. But one thing is certain, the more one lives a healthy life, the more you take away many vices – alcohol, tobacco, and drugs, better for us. Also, the nature of job one does can contribute to male infertility.

Does it have a perfect treatment?

If a man inherited it, can you cure it? Anything that is inherited cannot be cured but could be treated and help to have children.

This technology is making us to bypass the problem, not solving the problem. So, no matter your sperm count, as long as you have sperm in your testicles, we can make you have children.

Can’t stem cell technology cure it?

Well, maybe it might be able to help in that regards. Stem cell, fine you can make sperm anywhere in the laboratory and we might be able to solve the problem at that point.

Where do you get this technology from?

We are Nordica, so that means we are from Demark. Our headquarters is in Denmark.

What has been your most trying case in this practice?

The most interesting case was the oldest mother at the centre, who had her babies at 56. Here in Africa, there are many social and religious factors that affect fertility treatment.

We see people with the mindset that non-conceiving and bringing children up is a myth. We met her, when she was 53 and couldn’t have her treatment because there were some legal issues.

So, she didn’t have her children until she was 56. With one treatment, she had her first set of children. In another case, they said a certain patient was a witch because she was bleeding from some funny parts of the body and we had that to contend with. Some women had fibroid operation and had their wombs damaged.

So, what are your hobbies?

That’s one question I don’t like answering because I don’t know if I have one, but I watch football. Sometimes, I play golf but don’t have time playing.

Do you find time to spend with your family?

Yes, once I’m not traveling, I sit down with them. Many years ago, when I was developing myself, I didn’t have time for my family and I think this is the payback time, to be with them.

I like being with my family. I just want to stay around them. Almost every evening when I’m home, I stay with my children though.

Is your wife also a doctor?

No, she is a nurse.

So, how did you meet her?

Where else does a doctor meet a nurse? It’s in the hospital. Hahah

In what circumstance did you meet her?

Oh gosh! I think I was a youth corper then. I just came into the hospital, and that was my first day in the hospital. So, I saw this fine and dashing young lady.

Hmm, one thing led to the other and another to the other and here we are 29 years after that experience.

Were you really prepared for marriage then?

No, I was a young man enjoying myself. But after a while I said, why not pull the trigger.

How did she find her way into your heart?

She is just a nice woman and she understood me. She understood the fact that everything around me was trying to build a career. She could understand and fit into that dream. And that was the most important to me.

Eventually, how did you propose to her?

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Hahaha. Please don’t go to that side because that is the area my wife would like to read. Hmmm, please don’t start the story. This is the area she would concentrate, reading. All I can say now is that we are looking forward to becoming grandparents. Thank you!

Have you ever cooked a special meal for her?

I seriously don’t know how to cook. I’m not that kind of man that goes to kitchen. Hmm but for you to think of this, you must know how to cook. No I don’t know how to cook at all.

Your favourite meals?

Do I really have? I’m not a food person. I can eat anything and I can live anywhere in the world. That’s why I travel everywhere and I don’t miss food because I have to eat anything they have there.

Maybe I would say fried plantain. I like anything sweet. Give me ice cream, chocolate once in a while, when I could indulge but not food.

Much of sugar, they said, is not good for a man?

That’s why I said when I can indulge but I look forward to those days because I have sweet tooth.

Your lifestyle?

Simple! The only thing I’m particular about is dressing nice but it doesn’t have to be expensive.

What type of perfume do you wear?

Oh God, I like perfumes but I’m not freak to any particular one. I’m okay with any good perfume. It must not be too strong. I’m a collector of good perfumes. I love perfumes.

Do you wear jewelry?

Jewelry? Come on! I’m a man. Hmm. my wrist watches and rings are okay for me.

How many children is your marriage blessed with?

My marriage to Mrs. Oluranti is blessed with four children – three girls, and one boy. My first daughter is married. The second one is a doctor.

Could you make a brief of your family and educational background?

I hail from the family of late Mr. and late Mrs. Ebenezer Oludotun Ajayi. I’m from Abeokuta in Ogun State. We were born three and I’m the eldest of them – two males and a female.

My father was an exceptional disciplinarian. He brought us up in a different way. Then, it was tough but now, I give thanks to them because those trainings were what shaped me. Unfortunately, these are the good things we don’t pass on to our children.

We say things have changed but I don’t think values have changed. We are fast losing those values. Call it civilisation or so, but it’s bad. Parents don’t have time for their children anymore.

When I was in secondary school, my father was self employed. So, he would be waiting for me at home after school, and God so help me that I come back late, then I would explain to him why I came back late. You don’t find these things now. Too bad!

I trained in Nigeria all through and that is why after health, I’m interested in Nigerian education. All my trainings were done here in Nigeria. It was when I finished my post graduate that I moved abroad for other professional courses.

I started my primary school education at Salvation Army and moved to CMS Grammar School for my secondary school education. Then, University of Lagos for my first degree in Medicine, after which, I did my Post Graduate Programme at UCH, Ibadan.

Now, many couples seeking children would encounter hard-time with their in-laws, what would be your advice to the in-laws, as well as the affected couples?

First of all, to everybody, we should understand that the children come from the Lord. When you face with the problem of infertility, the worst thing you can do is to stay alone, even when you are being persecuted. There is no need for such sober mood. Be happy even when someone wants you moody.

The first thing you need to know is that you are not the only one affected. About one in five couples in Nigeria has infertility problem. So, you are not the only one affected. There is no stigma to it. It’s not because of anything that you have done. It’s a medical condition and therefore, you should seek help.

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Those who have succeeded in the IVF treatment, who didn’t see it as their responsibility to let people know what they did, should speak up to encourage others.

Instead of doing this, they go to churches and give all kinds of testimonies. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a Deacon in Baptist Church but I think church is really the last place one can tell lies or telling wrong stories.

Also, it’s a counter culture that many people in Nigeria don’t read. But I urged that when you have any problem, or challenge, the first thing for you to do is to be knowledgeable about the problem.

I would say that anything that involves emotion, which having children is one of them, should be careful with. As there are real ones, there are also fake ones. If you must invest your time and money, then you need to be sure that you are in the right place and doing the right thing.

The only way to know that is having the right knowledge so that nobody promises you what can’t be delivered. Anybody that is facing any kind of challenge in life, including infertility, should be knowledgeable about the problem.

You must also choose what to read because there are a lot rubbish on the internet. Health is something that we don’t have a choice but must dedicate time to. Not only in infertility.

I’m not saying challenge your doctors but they must be accountable and you must be able to ask them some intelligent questions, in order for you to be carried along.

As I always say, nobody should take any drug that he doesn’t know its name. Gone are the days when that happened. People must be interested in how they want to solve their problems.

Let the doctor explain to you in simple language what he is doing because even when you are doing the best thing, it’s not 100 per cent guaranteed. There is no need wasting your time and money.

You should be knowledgeable enough to make decisions so that you don’t make wrong decisions. Some people make decisions that can never give them babies, yet they said they are getting treated.

For instance, if you buy a new Mercedes Benz and you take it to the beach, and you want to drive by the sea side, it will sink because it’s a tube wheeled car. But if you buy a tokunbo Four-Wheel-Drive, you will get there.

So, it is not how much you have spent. It doesn’t matter if one is new and the other old, it’s by applying the right method or technology.

The same thing goes to IVF. If you are applying the right procedure in the wrong way, you will get wrong result. So, knowledge is the key. That’s what I try to make people understand.

What’s your highpoint in life?

Those are things I don’t think about because I believe I have not reached anywhere. Sometimes, I get disconnected, when people say I have done this and that. I wake up hungry, everyday, saying what can I do to improve our health care system?

Seriously, I have not seen any high point yet, may be soon, I will be able to say, oh yes, I have a high point. Yes, people talk about milestones, yes, we have that.